Always Alone
by ClosetFMAfan
Summary: Mei Chang had always been alone.


**This is very Mei-centric and I think it explains a lot of my interpretation of the Chang clan and the pressures put on Mei in her early life. I've always imagined her very very lonely except for Xiao Mei, obviously, because the Chang clan is so small everyone was so busy doing everything they can to stay alive no one could ever pay much attention to her. Oh and at the end, the small bit of dialogue from Al comes from Brookwrm389's story Armor which was also the main inspiration for this fic. I would suggest looking [the story] up, it's really good.**

**Note: This was previously part of my story Good For the Soul. It was taken out because I felt it didn't fit the theme I was going with.**

**It's pre-series and series**

She had always been alone.

It had been the way she was raised and the way she had lived most of her life. Her mother was always away at the Palace with her father (oh how she loathed the word). Her "father" was not to be bothered by the small Chang heir, even if she was his own daughter. None of the servants had much time to even greet her properly when the passed her in the halls, let alone spend any time with her what with all the work there was to be done.

The village children were never allowed within five respectful feet of her, and the only time their parents could get any closer than the children were when they were fixing her clothes, doing her hair, or pushing in her chair. Even then there was no interaction beyond a few questions and a, "Yes, Princess Mei."

It didn't come as much of a surprise when the Chang heiress came home one day with a miniature panda curled up in her sash. Despite her titles, she was a lonely child who had nobody her age to associate with. She didn't even have anyone years older than her to associate with. If a panda was the only one who could be a companion for her in all things, then the panda would stay. Xiao Mei became the friend Mei had never had growing up.

The times spent with her small black and white friend were precious and treasured, but nothing could ever quite compare to human relationships. Mei had none, and sought out the only thing she could think of to keep her away from thought of sorrow and loneliness- an art to dedicate herself fully to.

One of the best alkehestry tutors in Xing was found to teach the Emperor's daughter. The Master had stared regretfully down the road the Princess was supposed to be arriving, waiting for the caravan of care. He would have missed the small girl and her panda completely had she not started waving at him and running down the road towards him. She had brought no loving guardians, no servants to wait on her, no carts full of clothing. Just a small bag of necessities and Xiao Mei. The Master smiled at her and led her into the home, already knowing just how much she had been deprived of.

Mei studied alone as well. True, Xiao Mei was always there to rub her back and chatter excitedly when she needed it, but she was completely alone. There was no competition. She had to press herself to be the best she could be and always ended up pressing herself too far. More than once her Master had to push the young girl into bed and tell her to sleep or leave the establishment.

Returning home had been one of the hardest things Mei had done. Gone were the days that she could find small amounts of solace in a book or sitting in a glade surrounded by the Dragon's Pulse. No, now that she was home and well on her way to becoming a beautiful young lady, she had to act like one. She was endless drilled on just about every etiquette lesson imaginable.

With no alkehestry to turn to, and a panda as deep kneed in the mess as she was, Mei turned to a far off legend instead.

Edward Elric. The Fullmetal Alchemist with golden blond hair and golden eyes that sparkled with compassion and kindness to all they laid upon. His heart was full and his heart was pure. Everything from his dashing red coat to his leather attire and his automail hand was perfect. When they first met, their eyes would meet from across a crowded room and he would force his way through the crowd to sweep her off her feet and proclaim his love for the world to hear.

It was not healthy, this obsession of Mei's, but it helped assuage the loneliness.

Then the fateful words,

"Princess Mei, Princess Mei! Your father, his Royal Majesty has fallen ill. It is said he will die in some months' time!"

She kept tabs on every one of her siblings and their movements to see that the Emperor would name them heir. There were gifts bestowed and praises given. Of all her many siblings, there was one who had yet to make a single move to impress the Emperor. Ling Yao, of the usually outspoken Yao clan, had not made any promises, praised any aspects, or given any gifts. Shortly after, she found out why and followed in his footsteps.

She was going to Amestris.

Mei knew what the filthy Yao spawn did not. Edward Elric would help her. If she could find him, she could find the Philosopher's Stone and get back to Xing before her "dear brother" even started his third course. Of what meal, she was never sure, but it sounded good when she whispered it in Xiao Mei's ear as they struggled across the desert.

Well, nothing THERE had gone according to plan. First she fainted, weak from hunger and dehydration, and was rescued, not by a handsome man in a sporting red coat with golden hair and eyes, but by a funny looking skinny man. And he had introduced her to none other than a serial killer, though at the time she did not know his true identity, nor frankly, did she care. Both of them were heading to Central and they would assist her in her quest for true lo- uh, the Philosopher's Stone. The Princess's always had sidekicks in the novels she managed to peek looks at, right?

And then she had met him. How her heart had filled when Mr. Scar had said the Fullmetal Alchemist's name. Finally she could meet Edward Elric. The Hero of her Heart. The Champion of the People. The golden knight who would rescue her from the tower she had been placed in. The… short tempered grain of rice beneath the monster's foot?

At first she didn't believe him. There was no way THAT was the Fullmetal Alchemist. But he did fit the description. Gold hair, gold eyes, dark leather clothing, automail arm… How dare he? He had messed with her heart on purpose! Her pure maiden heart! The brute! The monster!

So she had done the only thing natural to her, fight her way out. Namely in the form of a giant fist. A little tacky, but hey, it worked. But then the bean alchemist (she could NOT think of him as her beloved Edward) had said something about Ishval and a war. Mei didn't know much about Ishval. One of the servants in her household had been Ishvalan, a refugee from a civil war. It was one of the reason she had never been scared of Mr. Scar. Before that point, Mei had always had trouble believing when people called Mr. Scar a serial killer, how could he ever hurt anyone? But in that instant, she saw the monster that could kill dozens.

And the monster… the one who could eat anything… he had set his eyes on her! She fought, naturally, but it hadn't been enough and he had cornered her. Xiao Mei stood up bravely to the monster but that mouth came closer, and closer, and then, it wasn't there anymore, but it was replaced by the heartless armor that had kidnapped her defenseless friend in the first place!

He picked her up and ran, saying something about getting her out of there. Where was 'there'? She could feel herself losing consciousness. And fast. The last thing she heard was something about Mr. Scar and how he had killed the armor's friend's parents. Then it was all dark, and she was alone, like always.

There was something fuzzy rubbing her face. Xiao Mei? She didn't want to open her eyes to check. There was something incredibly soothing about where she was. Was she at home in bed? No, it was much too hard for that. Perhaps she was at master's house, sleeping on her mat after a long day of routine sparring. That would explain how sore she was feeling, but no, that wasn't it either. She knew she wasn't in the desert; the temperature was much too mild. Then, where was she?

Then she heard the voice saying quietly, hopefully,

""We _do_ understand our position. There's not much we can do to change it. So, as long as we don't go against you people...will you allow us to keep searching for a way to restore our bodies?"

That voice… it was the voice of the armor who had kidnapped Xiao Mei… and saved her? But it sounded louder and more echo-y than normal. She opened her eyes and looked around. There were walls all around her made of the same metal as the armor. Was she… inside him? Where was his body? Was it not even there? How horrible.

He was empty inside. She knew that fact should creep her out, but somehow it didn't. She should scream to be released and swear on all the clans of Xing to have her vengeance on everyone involved with the plot. The drive seemed to be escaping her. She almost liked it in here.

For once, she didn't feel alone.

**Note: Yes, I do believe that Mei was raised with servants. Even though she's a Chang, she still is the daughter of the Emperor. However, unlike most of her brothers and sisters, none of these servants were dedicated solely to her/her comfort. **


End file.
